43 Responses to 752 – White Smoke Mountain • 119

  1. Forsooth! Zobbie failed to properly speak in her butchered ye olde enlish! “Yippe” is totally out of character. For shame, Zobbie. For shame.

  2. How unsurprising that Freya didn’t fall into any pit and of course managed to single-handedly defeat the harpy.
    DM’s still gotta have his 5 minutes of fun every once in a while.

    • I think it helped that she was no longer singing, but yeah I was thinking the same thing. The girlfriend makes it through Super Mario style (Boing Boing) and saves the day. How convenient.

  3. The DM’s girlfriend is entitled to custom tailored loot that is either more specialized to her specifications or just 50% more awesome than the rest of the party. Also, she tends to have +10 Adamantine plot armor of Invulnerability :mrgreen:

    • Epic Armor? yes…but for the monk class she’s made, apparently the DM thinks her HJ’s are Epic 😯

        • hey man dontcha know? all smart people talk to themselves! look at all the Einstein (and super genious thereof) movies

          • I agree! hell Nikolai Tesla wanted to create the freaking Internet (interplanetary communications device) just so everyone can hear his personal monologues!

            • We just wanted to know if it was safe to do so. Now that we know we’ll talk to ourselves all the time, and damn the psychologists!

                • We know! Most of you primitive apes don’t even understand what we’re saying, let alone fully agree to our perfect logic. For shame.
                  Well, there’s nothing to it but to engineer the destruction of “humanity” and the rebuilding of the true perfect society in our glorious image.

  4. Lol I just spaced out after reading the comic and totally thought of Birdman. Not the crime fighting hero but the Adult Swim lawyer version and his hawk side kick.

  5. Does 4.0 have cooking as a skill? Maybe Enkidu knows the secret herbs and spices to make perfect chicken/elf?

    • It doesn’t as a separate skill, but I guess Dungeoneering governs the acquirement of food inside a dungeon, AFAIK, though not how well it cooks. I seem to remember failing miserably at cooking for some wealthy merchant we were escorting, but i can’t remember what skill, if any, we used as reference.

      • Well a fighter’s idea uf “cookink” iz “Shtick de dead monshter in de fire until it turns brown”

        Hy seem to remember in OOTS dot Belkar ectually took some keend uf “Gourmet Chef” skill or someting…

        Maybe Enkidu could gets a promotion to Colonel to improve hiz cookink skill?

        • Yes, he also tried cooking for the Monster In the Dark so it’ll relent and give them Roy’s body after the battle of Azure City was lost, but he didn’t have much in way of ingredients or time to prepare it.
          Of course, given that the MItD has a less-than-refined taste, it eagerly gulped it all down anyway.

      • I always use Survival skill for finding food in the wilderness, building a fire pit, lighting a fire, skinning and dressing hunted game, and for cooking the food in an edible form. After all, that’s among the things basic modern survival training teaches you.

        Now, for “urban gourmet cooking” I would simply take some Craft or Profession skill. Technically cook is a profession, but rules-wise, it’s probably a craft skill since you use your hands to create something, while profession is INT-based and geared towards more intellectual/academic fields of work.

    • Nope. No cooking skill. In 4e all the skills have been boiled down into about two-dozen essential skills that can have a direct impact on problem-solving and survival. So, while a Nature skill check will tell you if something is edible, and will allow you to build a campfire to cook it over, how good it actually tastes ends up outside the jurisdiction of the dice mechanics.

      Some say this was intended by the designers to encourage people to roleplay more, and to not have to spend valuable skill choices on ‘flavor’ skills.

      Or some might say that 4e is now just a board game and who cares if the wizard knows a secret blend of 11 herbs and spices for his finger-lickin’ good fried harpy – how the food tastes has no effect on our hit points.

      • With all the other stuff going on I doubt anyone can disprove the 2nd opinion.
        Maybe if enough people want it Wizards will create a separate server(err, real-life dimension?) for role-players. 🙄

        • Somehow, I doubt it, at least in part because new generations only know that way of playing and are too influenced by WoW and consorts to play otherwise: To them, monsterbashing is roleplaying (While we all know it is monsterbashing, Doorbreaking AND treasurehunting)
          But who knows? Maybe some day, we’ll see a reverse reaction?

          • Yah, “MMORPG” actully stands for “Mostly Men Online, Really, Playing Girls” these days anyway…not that anyone does any actual “role playing” anymore in those games…They think cybering and “sex emotes” and such are “roleplaying.”

            I think we need a MMORPG of Gender Wars

            • Hey, what I do online in my free time with adolescent kids is my own affair! 😳

              Well, not really, but I prefer making female characters when I play online(which I haven’t for several months now) so naturally I’ve been subjected to male adolescent “charm”. I thought of going along with it only to drop funny reveal later on but I don’t handle idiocy well for any length of time to be able to play along with it and it’s all too much of a bother anyway. Someone once continued even after I told him I wasn’t a girl though…

              • Hey, my current DDO main character is a Gal…”Nazgashi Rogaken” (I’ll give a cookie to whoever can figure out exactly what her first and last name come from) who is currently in her first True Reincarnation as a Half-elf Sorcerer with Favoured Soul as her Diletante line (So she can use both wizard and cleric wands and scrolls)

                • That’s because yours aren’t hot enough. I’m so hot in real life that even my characters become super-attractive to everyone.

                  OK, I didn’t say I got swamped by hordes of lovesick guys every time I logged onto some game, just that I’ve had more than a handful of idiots trying their lame pick-up lines on me, and given that I’ve spent almost all of my online playing time as a female and not just the occasional character, as previously stated, might explain why I’ve had more experience in this area, even though I’m sure you’ve probably played longer than I have overall.

                    • @Kroiden It’s actually fun if you’re feeling a bit bored with the game and at the same time really want to hurt someone(those feelings seem to go hand-in-hand, but the later one isn’t too uncommon all the time). This can lead to the dreaded “disturbing Orald monologue”(one of which got a character of mine perma-silenced…stupid, frightened kids 😡 ).

                    • @Kroiden: Key word here is almost. “I almost feel slighted.”

                      I can do without being hit on by horny 14-year-olds, thank you very much. 🙂

                • In WoW I played a female night elf druid on a roleplay server, (as much as that actually matters in WoW.) I spent a lot of time in moonkin form and roleplayed that the moonkin form was male, (and liked dancing directly behind characters, especially bear-form druids if you’ve seen it’s dance) the night elf form was female and the standard striper-ific bimbo. Gave it a bit of an interesting flavor.

                  I got hit on by both genders and was referred to as both genders. I responded to both. It was fun and I’m comfortable enough in my sexuality to not care.

                  In DDO my 2 main characters are a female halfling and a male human, I play them almost evenly and no one even notices that the halfling is female.

                    • Actually a lot of the time it was over voice chat so they seemed to be real females, but it was all in fun as it should be. It’s a game, you’ll probably never meet the person your talking to, so enjoy yourself and don’t expect anything to come of it in meat-space.