The Tuesday Videos:

One of my favorite comics as a kid has Marvel’s What If? series. They were so awesome because they were able to take wildly divergent paths from the official comics continuity, and show you things as the might have been had events gone horribly, horribly awry. For instance, what if this happened?

Certainly we would all be a lot happier if I could resist things like this next clip, but since I obviously can’t, I’d like to ask for your forbearance. In case you’ve ever wondered why Compaq has never made it out of the middle of the pack… the answer’s coming right up.

This last video might make you hungry for pizza. It might make you want to be a pizza. Regardless of this, it will almost certainly lead you to conclude that Pizza Hut is more fun anywhere other than here.

26 Responses to The Tuesday Videos:

  1. First video = Freakin’ Hilarious! And definitely a good way to get rid of a body. Second video…. uh.. yeah. Sadly, I think I’d seen that one before. Or something close enough to be just like it. And the third video didn’t so much make me hungry for pizza as hungry for asian women. Always kinda been a weakness of mine anyway. This just reminds me of that fact. Good finds Kevin. Now I’m going to bed.

    • Yep, same on all you’ve said. Well, apart from going to bed. Of course, “going to my bunk” would’ve been a funnier ending to your post, given your previous statements.

      The long haired guy in the first video was very cute, and I couldn’t help but agree he’ll be ten guy’s bitch if he were in jail…mmm.

      • Hot Asian chicks? And that cute guy from video #1?

        I’ve got to say though, the guys making the commercial are real assholes, sticking such a blatant “look, we haz teh sex, come buy!!” sign all over it.
        I’m amazed time and again how I’m supposed to be part of the same species with so many individuals who would actually be influenced to eat there because they showed a bunch of pretty girls, and you know it works.
        Damned dirty apes the lot of them.

      • Appears to be a “Veggie Pizza” of some sort. I’m guessing the white squiggles are bean sprouts; nothing else is distinctive.

      • After a thorough google of possible toppings… not really.

        One item is probably chunks of tomatoes. The stuff on top is too thin to be bean sprouts. Maybe shredded parmessan but it’s not melty so maybe a shredded vegetable like daikon. Then there are grey chunks of something with a structure so I’m guessing mushrooms or squid. Anyhoo I’m going to imagine it as tomato + mushroom + parmessan. Heck even daikon would be nice. Mmmm, now to invite the Korean girl.

  2. first vid- meh, I’ve seen better
    second vid- Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
    Third vid- hot girlies, total tard dance, mmmmm pizza

      • Just sayin” ;P You yourself have posted some much better ones. There’s some hilarious stuff all over Youtube. Some vids I have trouble understanding if they’re trying to be funny or serious- that grey area leaves me wondering WTF?

  3. Chingigo, chingigo was best move of the dance In my humble opinion.
    (And it doesn’t matter what site i visit lately, that one pops up for the last few months.)

  4. So the guy gets what appears to be a real lightsabre by mail order…and all he can think of to do is audition for the next “Jackass” movie?

    Sheesh…gimme a functional Lightsabre and I could think of way cooler uses for it. The things never seem to run out of power for one thing…at least I’ve never seen one run out except in parodies…

  5. So I put my critical hat on to give you my impressions:

    The first one just seemed like fairly standard YouTube fare, an interesting premise, but the execution (If you will forgive the pun) wasn’t great.

    The second one, I had a look to see if it was real, and it is. This was before YouTube was around, so I really wonder what posessed them to do this, when quite obviously none of them were into it. Oh, and another sketch like this was done by East Devon Council – which is in the local authority near me, but the guy in this one really does seem to be into it:

    The third one, the way that they gave explicit instructions to the people made it seem like they really were expecting people to do that dance in public, a bit like the chicken dance for “I feel like chicken tonight”, but much less catchy.

    • Most likely, the Compaq video is one of those “inspirational” videos shown to employees during regularly scheduled torture sessions…er..I mean “employee events”

      • I always found it amusing that the sexual harassment videos always seemed to be how-to’s rather than deterrents. And they were always geared towards men. Never showed women harassing men. I had one job where the management actually had the nerts to say that only the guys had to watch it.

  6. I found the first video funny, but I have to agree that there are much better ways of using a lightsaber. Although I have to admit that there would be several disappearances in my area if I were to receive one in the mail.

    The second one was like watching a train wreck – you wanna look away but you couldn’t.

    All I can say about the third one is to ask if anyone else noticed that they apparently did it impromptu in an open restaurant. The girl in the next booth took out her phone and started recording it.

    • Y’know, I never really understood this proverb about train wrecks and wanting to look away but not being able to.
      Most people gawk at accidents and seem quite attracted to them, stopping what they’re doing and staying to watch, and personally I don’t find myself wanting to “look away”, so I have to wonder how much is this “looking away” part of the proverb true and how much is just people trying to distance themselves from something that might look callous?
      Not to mention there’s a reason why they love showing bloody bits on the news, or all the accident videos on YouTube.

      After all, there’re a perfectly reasonable evolutionary reasons for it, and they’re still true these days. You want to see what the problem is so you can avoid the danger yourself, and see if anyone you know was hit(and weep/gloat depending on your disposition towards said person).
      Also the possibility of scavenging, but people usually refrain from it these days.