The Tuesday Videos: Lindsay Stops Smoking Edition

Our first vid is another gem from the wonderful world of Taiwanese news, courtesy of the NMA World Edition. It is a sad but oft repeated tale of youth spun out of control. Be sure to make note of the car. Uncle Walt would be so disappointed.

This next is an oldie but a goodie. It caught my eye and I just had to watch it again… and then inflict it on you. In it, an innocent homemaker recounts her harrowing but true exposure to the Dark Side of the Force, courtesy of Wife Swap. (I understand they cut her another check after the cameras stopped rolling which she graciously accepted.)

Edit: The original vid had the embedding turned off, so I had to find an alternate. It’s okay, but the first one I had picked was a little better. If you want to look at it, click here.

Bringing home the Star Wars is a piece of my childhood, a PSA I got genuinely excited to watch. (Oo! Surprise! I was a geeky kid too!) This is for all you wicked smokers out there.

34 Responses to The Tuesday Videos: Lindsay Stops Smoking Edition

  1. Is it my computer or the videos themselves or the site, but both videos were really really soft and quiet I couldn’t hear them even at max volume. I tried the videos that linked at they were also. I havn’t had an issue with this on my computer before. If you could look into this Kevin, that would be great.

    • I had no such problem with any of the videos.

      1st: Kinda annoying, really. The one you posted before was funnier, but this one’s just…predictable, I guess. I mean, yea, she went to jail, there’s the obligatory sex-in-jail joke, but they forgot to mention how the “average Joe” would NEVER be released after just 13 days out of the 90-day sentence. And then they wonder why celebrities allow themselves to act crazy.

      3rd(saving the best for the last): Kinda cheesy, but that’s SW for ya. Figures the “protocol” droid wouldn’t smoke, though I’m not sure how R2D2 meant to smoke anyway. Maybe they upgraded it with lungs together with the rocket engines and whatever else they stuffed there in the prequels(I guess it ran out of fuel by the time of the originals?).

      2nd: DARK-SIDED!!! 😆
      The looks on the other people’s faces was also priceless.
      I was expecting her to pick up a torch and pitchfork and shout “burn the witch!” or something too.
      And as someone in the comments mentioned, gluttony is a sin, and she’s very sinful.

      Oh, and I’m infinitely grateful that it wasn’t the other kind of wife-swapping she was involved in.

    • There doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with the videos. My guess is that you have the player volume turned down. With YouTube, if the player volume is changed, it remembers for every video you play subsequently. So if you turned the volume way down watching My Little Pony Play last week because you didn’t want your cube mates to hear, and haven’t touched it since, it would still be turned down now.

  2. That “god warrior” scares me, sickens me, and gives me the heebie-jeebies all at the same time. Anyone who’d go off all psycho and incoherant in front of an innocent little girl like that would find her ass making skid marks straight out the door. I wouldn’t care if it was for a TV show or not.
    I totally remember seeing that PSA on TV! The droids were totally awesome. Co-incidentally, I’ve been smoking ever since then, so I guess PSA’s really aren’t that effective.

    • She’s totally allowed to mentally scar that kid, since she’s the mom. This happened after she came back home to her own house.

      I couldn’t tell you the details, but I do know that the woman agreed to do the show again, presumably after the cash from the first one ran out.

      • Apparently the God Warrior (retch) has principals that take a back seat to cash. That was as sickening an example of Christianity as I’ve ever seen. While I’m sure that some would find this kinda thing funny, I personally want to puke. Someone married that psycho? Must have been an arranged marriage.

            • On the other hand, the other wife was into Wicca or whatever, so I pity her kids as well. Seriously, after getting rid of a myriad of stupid religions and replacing them with a few big ones(Though now that they don’t burn their heretics they’re starting to fracture like crazy, producing all kinds of sects), do we really need to dig in the past for more? At least revive Moloch instead, that’ll at least help the gene pool cleanse itself of your genius.

              • Actually, I find that Wiccans can be annoying but nowhere near as intolerant or hateful as hardcore Christians. As with the New Age group, Wiccans are on the recieving end of ridicule and intolerance. Generally I find that the ones I meet seem a little out there, but usually willing to live and let live. I may not share their faith but I can respect that. Even the ones that seem crazy are mostly like that. The God Warrior just creeps me out and pisses me off at the same time.

                • My beef is about choosing a religion at all, but I guess lots of people just have to have some silly faith in something to not break in a world where they know they’re just insignificant, tiny specks of flesh-filled goodness that every organism around them is plotting to devour.
                  Just pop in some pills and lick some toads like you used to and don’t pretend you’re anything but a stupid little weirdo.
                  Bah, spirituality is shit.

                  • Dude, that’s as close-minded and intolerant as those you claim to despise. A self rightious athiest is just as bad as a self rightious believer and that is the single most inane statement I’ve seen you make in this forum. What’s it to you what I or anyone else believes if we aren’t hurting anyone? Why don’t you save that bile for those who deserve it? You know, the ones actually doing harm like murderers, rapists, dishonest politicians and intolerant assholes.

                    • Excuse me? While I wholeheartedly admit to despising and laughing at any kind of religious conduct, I also approve of people doing and believing in whatever they want.
                      Same as my stand on drug use- I don’t like it but people can do whatever they want, and if they die from it(be it drugs or whatever else) then it’s their own fault and I just don’t care.

                      I see no difference between what I said in my comment above to what Kevin repeatedly says on this blog. We both think religion is shit, but we also don’t think people should be prevented from their silly worship.

                      The problem with the real self-righteous atheists is that they want to forbid, minimize and restrict people’s freedom of worship(They’ve got that “lets get at them!” attitude). I’m not like that, I just don’t give a damn about what other people do as long as it doesn’t affect me. I can hate, despise or laugh at it, but I won’t stop it.

                      Well, maybe $cientology should be banned and all its practitioners shot. 😉

                    • If you don’t think the last few comments were insulting, think again. I’m done with this frigging forum making fun of me and others like me. We aren’t all stupid little wierdos or raging nutballs. Kevin, I like your comic and will keep reading but I’m done with this forum. Orald, I’ve tried to present my opinion in a reasonable manner and am pretty thick skinned but if you check the tone of your last few comments you might see why I’m more than a little offended. Thanks for killing what was up to now an enjoyable forum for me. Oh, and Kevin isn’t usually THIS insulting when he does his God blogs.

  3. You would think that if she was driving Herbie, the car wouldn’t let itself crash…

    Someone smack that second lady with a Harry Potter book.

    So, Threepio…littering is better than smoking?

      • Herbie was rendered catatonic with high octane ethanol and wasn’t in any shape to avoid the crash. Clearly Lindsay is a bad influence for an innocent lovebug. Rumor has it that he’s become a gigolobug to support his increasing ethanol habit.

  4. oh my god i remember the star wars anti-smoking commercial i was like 12 yrs old when i saw that. and this causes me to expound on another subject ( although i will make it brief) i remember that when all the smoking laws started changing and the states started litigation against the tobacco companies. peoples defence was we didnt know that smoking causes cancer. ive known that smoking causes cancer since before the litigation proved it. and this commercial reinforces my point. awesome video. i watched V and VI yesterday and loved it.

    • The people’s point was curious, but it certainly did make sense. Basically, the issue was that cigarette manufacturers told everyone that smoking was safe and healthy, and that they had the science to back them up. Now most intelligent people knew that this was bullshit, and that they were being bald-faced lied to. However, there were a few folks who believed the manufacturers, probably because they really WANTED to believe that they were safe.

      So… some people were suing because they had been fatally defrauded. Some people were suing simply because a company does not actually have the right to lie like that, ESPECIALLY when so many individual’s health is at risk. Cigarette manufacturers were not helped by the fact that their only defense was that most people should have known it was a lie. That is not actually a defense.

      This type of activity continues. The milk industry perpetuates the myth that milk is necessary for good health, and thereby directly contributes to this country’s obesity epidemic, and all the other problems associated with that. (For the record, drinking milk does almost nothing for you, and is in fact bad for your health. The pasteurization process robs the milk of anything healthy, a small part of which is replaced with artificial supplements your body will largely ignore and pass. A human no longer requires milk of any kind after age four, and before then needs HUMAN milk, not that of a cow. A kitten will die within a week if fed nothing but pasteurized cow’s milk.) The only real difference between cigarette and milk manufacturers is that more people believe the lie about milk… which in my opinion makes it even worse.

      • Erm, Kevin, I’m afraid you’ve fallen prey to an anti-milk fad perpetrated by the soy industry and people who believe that any “industrially produced” food must be automatically unhealthy. Since when does pasteurization remove calcium from milk?

        Funny how they never preach no milk drinking and no meat eating to, say, the Tuareg nomads of the Sahara. Milk and meat from camels, sheep and goats make up a large part of their diet. Similarly with other desert or arctic people in places unsuited to large-scale agriculture (or agriculture at all, like Namibia). Are the Tuareg fat? No. Of course, they do a lot of physical exertion… which brings me to the lack of exercise endemic in our societies.

        According to geneticists, lactose tolerance is a secondary characteristic in human evolution, the earliest humans prior to the advent of domestication of animals were probably all lactose intolerant as adults. But everywhere where you find societies that keep large lifestock that gives milk, you will find sairy products as a foodstuff and you will find a high percentage of lactose tolerance in the population. Anthropologists will tell you that the ability to digest animal milk as adults is one of the traits that allowed humans to spread around the globe. You find lactose tolerance in i.e. large parts of China, but not in Japan, because places like Japan are islands where people rarely kept large lifestock but lived off fish and fowls, which is why there was no selective advantage for people with the genetic trait of lactose tolerance in places like Japan. But everywhere else, it was an evolutionary advantage to be able to eat dairy products.

        People in America (and to a lesser extend Germany and other nations) are FAT because of the goodamn SUGARS put into everything, from soft drinks to bread to canned fruits and cheap salami. It costs MORE to buy canned fruit without additional sugar added than with, go figure. And I hate those instead-of-sugar no-calories substitutes. While they are a boon to people with diabetes, the problem is that the body registers something sweet being eaten and produces insulin to deal with it, but then, no glucose or fructose arrives, the body stays hungry and you eat even more.

        Here in Germany you can buy stuff like cookies, chocolate and ice cream from not just Germany but a bunch of other countries, too. But one thing I noticed is that the American cookies and ice cream are noticably sweeter than the German or British ones. In fact, I once tried Ben-and-Jerry’s ice cream just our of curiosity, but couldn’t finish it. Same with cookies… the American ones are more sugary than the British biscuits or German Kekse, even though they look the same on first glance.

        The city where I live is fortunate in that we have a small ice cream parlour (open only in the spring and summer) owned by a family business of Italians who still make their ice cream by hand, using seasonal fruits instead of flavoring, which means they sell some flavours you find no-where else in town, but usually only for a short time. When I looked up ice cream production recipies on Wikipedia and got to the link to “Gelata/Italian ice cream”, the article mentioned that traditional Italian ice cream has less sugar and fat contend than American. Hm.

        While in the UK, I once saw a BBC documentary about the food fads and typical foods of Great Britain during the past few decades, and that episode featured the 1970s. The surprising find of the food historians was much of the party food and daily dishes were terrible viewed through the lens of our health-food obsessed time. Lots of big sugary desserts, cakes, tons of butter in everything… and yet most people were slim. But when they compared daily life in the 1970s with today, they found that people walked a lot more on average, pace of life was slower (chronic stress can make you fat, too) and there were fewer ready-to-eat highly processed foodstuffs to buy, like microwave meals and convenience food.


        • That said, yes, milk does of course contain calories.
          I once tried soymilk for a bit, because someone had told my husband he should replace milk with soymilk to lower colesterole… an experiment which latest exactly until the point where I read the small print about ingredients on the packaging and discovered they put sugar in it. Um, no. I like soybeans, occasionally, but… goodbye soymilk.

          • I hate milk. Never liked the vile thing on its own.

            Anyway, from what I’ve heard, a lot of that nice calcium doesn’t actually get absorbed in the body anyway, which is probably the same with just about every kind of “nutritional additives/supplements”.
            I also heard it’s not animal/human milk per-se that’s the problem, it’s just that cow milk in particular isn’t the healthiest/most compatible.

            I’ve never cared much about eating “healthy”, since I think exercise is more important than your food towards the goal of staying in shape.
            I mean, sure, eat a somewhat balanced diet, there’s stuff your body can’t make, but I won’t start weighing my food/calculating my caloric intake.

            Also, too much fatty foods give me a mild nausea and headache, so I prefer cooking potatoes to frying them, for example.

            And right now I’m still tired after my walk/jog, even though I came back over an hour and a half ago. I hate exercising. 🙁

          • Not that I am a particular advocate for soymilk, but if you check the labels you can avoid the ones with sugar.

            As for the above, I’ll amend my position to say instead that cows’ milk is unhealthy for almost all Americans. I do, by the way, advocate for broccoli.

  5. I like broccoli. And spinach. And meat. I heart dead cows, and I like eating birds. I’d prefer to kill my own meat, but alas I’m no hunter and hunting in America is too damn complicated anyway, what with the licenses and the laws and blah blah blah. I’d just want to go out with a gun and shoot something then take it home and eat it. Preferably something big enough to eat on for a few days or weeks with proper refrigeration. I knew a guy in junior high school who went hunting, shot at a deer, missed, and later found out the bullet went through the wooded area he was in, into a farmer’s field and killed a cow. He had to pay for the cow (or his dad did anyway, we were in junior high and it was like $500). But, in the end he had bagged a big one and had lots of meat for a while.

    • “I’d just want to go out with a gun and shoot something then take it home and eat it. Preferably something big enough to eat on for a few days or weeks with proper refrigeration.”
      Well, I hear there are lots of hitchhikers all along those lonely country roads, so… 😉

      And from what I’ve read on Wiki’ a few weeks back it said that spinach didn’t actually have that high an ir0n content, and what little it had was of the kind your body couldn’t absorb anyway(I think because it’s not from animal tissues).
      But then you could always consume blood for your iron, like in blood-sausages. I wonder how those taste, like livers?
      Livers are rich in iron, aren’t they? Mmm…soft, half-raw chicken livers. I’ve been meaning to buy some for quite some time.