85 Responses to 693 – White Smoke Mountain • 61

    • Mmm…Delicious, soft, decomposing boobs! every* necromancer’s favorite!

      Though personally I like my boobs freshly-corpsified.

      *Except for the weird, perverted ones- you know, the ones who like corpses with dongs.

  1. obviously its the one who’s talking, the DM (or kevin) admits it or not

    but yea 9 looks like a woman, the others apparently have dicks o.O
    and, why did bunker use so much force to open that door? did they jam it closed or something? was he hoping for a preemptive door in face attack?

  2. Well, obviously no. 5 is the only one singing and/or alive. The rest look pretty dead. Could be more than one female corpse in the line-up, hard to tell from the angle. But, yeah, only one of them being lippy so far.

  3. Immidietly got reminded of “Zelda Ocarina Of Time” both for the song, and for the zombies soon to tea bag Bunker’s face till he dies..*shudder*

  4. At least it was not the “hey Cow” Song.

    Maybe fit in “who are the people in your neighborhood” In your neighborhood, the people you fight every day.

  5. I really wonder, how a DM would describe such a situation. If No.9 is the only female one. Drawn it’s all well, but narrated?
    “As you enter the room, you see a line of naked corpses leaning on the wall. Each has a number carved into it’s chest. The line starts with No. 5, then 7, 9, 11, 14(?),… . All corpses are human male but No.9 which is female. Suddenly the first one opens his eyes…”
    That said, I also guess it’s the lippy one ^^

    • This is the same thought I had. In a narrated game how are you supposed to give enough clues for the players to figure it out without straight out telling them?

      • This is the type of thing I’d use a visual for. Drawing a picture, arranging some specially painted mini’s, that sort of thing. Making sure the players know that in *this* case they’re supposed to take what they see literally.
        In one case I gave my players a map and told them that *this* map is exactly how it looks in game. Every rip, stain, fold, notation, whatever “actually” existed on the map their characters were looking at. This worked out MUCH better than trying *not* to put too much emphasis on the clue, while describing the rest of the map.

  6. It could be worse…they could be singing “C is for Cookie….that’s good enough for me!”

    Of course there’s always the “Enkidu, blow em all up” solution, but the riddle solution probably causes the “Magic Mouthed” zombie to tell them how to open a secret treasure room or something…

  7. Is the tune meant to be instantly recognisable internationally? Cos I’m stumped.

    As for the corpse game, it’s like a far more entertaining version of Deal or No Deal. You should pitch it to the networks!

  8. Why is Freya still topless? Has she given up on finding clothing and embraced it now a la National Geographic?

  9. Hmm our Heroes appear to outnumber the corpses… everyone pick a number and decapitate them all at the same time. Why pick one when you can have them all? XP for everyone!

    • You’re kidding me, right?


      Only 3 of the corpses midsections can be seen, and two of them are at a sharper angle. The first one has a visible navel, the other two, not so much. Now, number 5 simply has an inny, as have the last three generations of males in his family. His great-great grandfather had an outie, but he was also an accountant with a weak chin, poor eyesight, and a host of other recessive traits.

      Number 7 used to have an outie, but the surgeon removed it when operating on an umbilical hernia because he thought it would be the perfect size to make a yarmulke for his pet mouse, who was Jewish. (The surgeon worshipped Lageron.) As it turned out, the belly button was slightly too large and the mouse threw it away.

      If this answer is not satisfying to you, I really do not need to know. 😉

      • Leather yarmulke? I don’t think it’ll sit on the head that well, too coarse and ungainly. A cloth one would be better, so the mouse probably lied about it being too large(you can snip/stitch stuff, you know) for its head, it just wanted a comfortable, normal cloth yarmulke instead.
        Also, you can knit cloth ones with all kinds of delicate patterns.

        • In order for it to be “leather” it has to be from an animal with both the right kind and the right thickness of skin. (Plus tanning and whatnot.) You can’t make leather out of human belly button skin, it’s far too thin. It’d just be a skin hat.

          • “Skin hat” sounds worse. Although “yarmulke” sounds even worse than that.

            Also, now that I’ve thought about it, I don’t believe you can wear a human-skin kippah anyway, so your mouse was faking his Judaism, most likely for the purpose of some nefarious antisemitic scheme! I knew you were out to get me, Kevin!

            I wonder if Reavers made such kippahs after they were done raping you to death and eating your flesh, preferably in that order.

  10. Awesome – I do have to say that this scene brings back a lot of happy, silly DnD memories of the campaigns my friends and I used to cook up, always tried to get something nice and goofy in the adventure.

    I can’t see the number on the female closest to the reader. Is she a 13?

  11. the corpse next to 11 is 14. But let’s let Kevin tell his story the way he plans to instead of trying to figure it out before he posts it.

  12. I also believe it is number 14, because she is an undocumented worker, and was confused by the numbering process.

      • I love how Enkidu is telling our poor doodad a number that isn’t even there…obviously he WANTS Bunker’s face torn off…

            • How is a mention of Wehrner Von Braun only semi-relevant to a discussion of NASA’s “Americanism” in the 60s?

              • Seems like my jokes aren’t well understood. I was joking at some people’s(Kevin! He’s after me!) accusations that I myself have been bringing up Hitler etc on unrelated occasions.

                And Braun wasn’t making the computer guiding programs, just the physical rockets’ design, so the blame is again at the feet of the Americans.

                And this whole thing is Kevin’s fault, as usual, for telling a joke I didn’t get about non-Americans being bad at math(which I personally am, but never mind that), which, I guess, relates to John’s comment, which I didn’t get either. What’s an “undocumented worker” anyway?

                Also, I’ve been awake for far too long.

                  • And yet others call “Criminals”

                    Guess what they do to “Undocumented Workers” who sneak across the southern border in MEXICO?

                    • Err, let them stay over, raise their children and then have the whole mainstream media protest against the deportation of a few hundreds of them(out of many thousands), saying they’ll even hide them and their children so the authorities can’t deport them(All the while comparing the situation to refugee Jews during WWII, and the government to Nazies)?

                      Well, at least that’s how it’s done here these last few weeks.

                      And I’m not kidding, that’s exactly what they’ve been doing, including the hiding and comparison to Nazies part. Mainstream media.

  13. Seems to me the solution is simple. 60 seconds is ten rounds before he attacks. Kick the living hell outta these losers.

      • I’m just spitballin’ here, but I’d imagine that if you started pounding the shit outta the monsters while they were waiting for the answer, they’d most likely take that AS your answer.

  14. Hmm, personally i think Caveman has it.
    The zombies are numbered 5 , 7 , 9, 11 and (possibly) 14.
    9 is the only one that is not a prime number. 🙄

  15. Oh man. Im so dumb. Only one of them is talking. So if that number isnt prime, go with the one that is doing the threat of “ill tear”, not “They will”

      • Well, it really depended on the last hidden number Kevin. Which was 13, so it was prime numbers.

        I think someone owes someone else a cookie.