599 – Chorka • 08

Christmas is almost upon us, as is HOLE’s #600! In the spirit of the season and in keeping with the Wednesday Video, I now leave this kick-ass movie on your holiday plate.

Bon appétit.

21 Responses to 599 – Chorka • 08

  1. Beautiful. Would have been much more satisfying to see him drop and stay there, though. He’s one baaad motherf- HUSH YO MOUTH – I’m just talkin’ bout Santa.

  2. Looks like we’ll be getting a dead pope for Christmas.

    What I can’t figure out is, why is Swillsberne still working for Vorpine? Vorpine has lost his clerical powers (both the mystical ones and the churchly ones), his title (it’s hard to be pope of a dead goddess), his dominion, his gold (which was swept into the sea, or spent on bribes), and now his dignity too. So what’s left? Did Vorpine put a Greater Geas on Swillsberne from some scroll he had lying around? I don’t think Swilly and Vorpine are such good friends. They’re both pretty selfish bastards.

      • You know, I had originally been about to write something about “the love that dares not speak it’s name”, but then I thought, hang on… there are characters that have HoYay subtext written all over them, some I can easily imagine as bisexual (like Martin), and then there are those who are so clearly utterly hetero. Swillsberne falls squarely into that latter category.

        Vorpine, now, Vorpine’s just crazy. He’d probably castrate himself to get rid of that icky sex stuff, similar to that Christian theologian, scholar and monk (a Christian monk, not the king-fu kind) Origenes a.k.a. Origen of Alexandria (185-254 A.D.), considered one of the early fathers of the Christian Church.

        Bishop Eusebius of Caesarea (263–339 A.D.), the famous Church historian, wrote that Origen, following Matthew 19:12 literally[*], castrated himself. (Although apparently modern historian are still debating if that really happened or if Eusebius simply made it up, because Origen was a Neo-Pythagorean and Neo-Platonistwho interpreted scripture allegorically, not literally. Still, in the Middle Ages, the story of Origen cutting off his manhood for God apparently inspired a few other monks.)

        Origen’s nickname was Adamantius, which means “unbreakable” in Greek. That’s a kickass name for a superhero if I ever heard one. Unfortunately, it didn’t prevent him from being tortured to death.

        [*] Matt. 19:12: “For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother’s womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.”

    • As soon as Vorpine became Pope, he became the single richest individual in Lesser Earth. He now has all of the resources of the church itself at his command. You’re right that Swill and Vorpine are not friends, though Swill has more than enough reason to stick around.

  3. If you think Santa is bad ass watch out for his little elves… those little curly shoes freak me out.

    I think its customary that all mascots be it Santa’s or Mickey Mouses are all level 3 black belts.

  4. That was brilliant! Punk got what he deserved. Too bad that in this day and age the parents could sue whoever “Santa” is working for maybe even win.