581 – Gorch • 08


I used to never believe that the internet could play a part in the destruction of the human race. I thought it was a good thing. A medium for the exchange of ideas and cultures, of ideas, words, and song. A way to help the common man bridge our differences and bigotries of those we knew nothing about.

I was so wrong. So very, very wrong.

23 Responses to 581 – Gorch • 08

  1. Arg, evil puppets!! Do not want!

    In other news… huh? Violet isn’t a troll? But that can’t have been a mere illusion spell, because Morty touched her, and he would’ve noticed if she was actually smaller in reality than she looked like. I bet the group’s faceless gamemaster is just pulling this development from his posterior… no way could he have planned that chain of events that led to Bunker meeting Violet in the first place. And the whole troll-candy-means-marriage-proposal sounded like something that any gamemaster would make up on the spur of a moment because it’s too funny an opportunity to pass up.

    Poor Bunker’s hips, getting crushed. Poor Bunker’s chest, getting slobbered on. 😯
    Please don’t tell me this isn’t the polymorphed beholder…ah no, the beholder died.
    Oh dear, please don’t tell me this is Swillsberne polymorphed into a troll woman, having bizarro-sex with Bunker! 😯 I mean, Swillsberne isnt a spellcaster last I checked. Do rogues in 4E still have the skill to use magic items like scrolls that normally only wizards can use? But Violet’s accent is gone, and she doesn’t talk like Swillsberne does. Whew.

    My mind is in a very strange place this morning.

    Bunker without his helmet looks rather odd. But I’ve thought that every time we’ve seen him without it.

    Hey, that means Martin helped a spy to infiltrate the group and to knock the group leader unconscious. Either he is a co-conspirator, or he’s a traitor. Either way, he’s a liability to the group. Off with his head! 😈

      • I’m not exactly that young anymore.

        I still remember watching the 1983 “V” scifi series when I was young. I remember The Last Unicorn, and Ray Harryhausen’s Clash of the Titans with Laurence Olivier as Zeus. Now there’s all those damn remakes all over the place these days…

      • Perhaps Bunker should find a complicated legal way by which his marriage to Violet can be transfered to Swillsberne. Bunker should make sure he doesn’t hire Martin as his legal aid and expert though… or Bunker might end up being married to the rogue. :mrgreen:

        But in that case I’m sure Swillsberne’s buddy, the god-killing Pope of The Goddess Formerly Known As Berel can declare a divorce. 😈 By cutting off someone’s head, probably.

  2. I was gonna ‘complain’ about the comics not being safe for work… Morning coffee; all over the monitor. Oh well, the good news is I’m the IT guy so who’s gonna check. NOW that’s a Lot of dummies. They however are truly not safe for work.

    I wonder if I will ever be able to listen to that song again?

  3. Wait, what!? Samantha gothy Wizard chick Glamdiri mysterious woman has polymorphed into a troll!?

    Holy plot twists, Kevinman!!

    • LOL! Reading you guys’ reaction to Violet has been even more fun than writing her, and I like Violet a lot!

      Stay tuned, all will not be explained… but there will be some more clues.

      • Not all will be explained but there will be some clues?! This sounds like Deja vu.

        “While I would have accepted the de-boned head of an elephant with elephantiasis, it was actually the de-boned head of an elephant with proteus syndrome.”

        Tricky trickeh.

  4. The Rubicon has been crossed- they be havin teh sex! Yahoo! Bunker looks strangely calm about it. Could it be the concussion?

  5. And here I was only just getting used to the idea of constant boobies on the screen, then BAM! Full out PG sex scene. I guess I’m okay with that, my kids aren’t old enough to notice it and hey, I like sex. So good on ya Kevin. I have my theories about who or what Violet may or may not be, but I’ll just wait and see what happens next. Ooooooh the suspense is killing me!

  6. I finally got a chance to watch the video. Whew. Now, being a fan of ventrilloquists, and also of choral music- I must say it was a brave and original attempt, but they need a LOT of work. I wasn’t expecting the Mormon Tabernacle Choir there, but the dummies sounded a little too dummy-ish. It’s obvious these guys were ventrilloquists first, and singers second (if at all). One (or more) of them were badly off-key. Forgivable if it was a complex harmony, but for something as easy as “Yesterday” (in unison even) it just shows that a little practice beforehand really pays off. Then again, I guess we’re talking about some sort of Hungarian talk show. Gotta love that wacky east-European humor.

    • I think the nasal dummy-ish quality was totally on purpose. If you think about it, if they had used their normal voices, it would just have been singers holding dolls.

      What I want to know is why they shoved the black guy in the back and wouldn’t let him have a solo.

      • What I want to know is why you made us suffer with you. 🙁

        Why he had to post
        I dunno he wouldn’t say
        I heard something wrong
        Now I long for yesterday 😛