542 – The Curse • 03


When I was four or so my mom used to have me kept after (pre)school with a crotchety old woman everyone called “Nanny.” Nanny kept kids for extra cash, which was pretty normal back then. She never wore anything but an old house dress (think mu-mu, but way older) and we kids had to stay in the tiny living room, completely silent, laying on the floor. No food, no drink, and no bathroom. Nanny didn’t really like children very much, and didn’t want them messing up anything in her house. She was the perfect sitter.

I was there for two years.

Anyway, the one bright spot was at four o’clock in the afternoon when Batman would come on TV. I was able to so completely lose myself in the program that I could totally forget where I was and what I was (or wasn’t) doing there. I loved Batman, and wanted to be him. I wanted to be a Good Guy and wear tights and a cape and beat the hell out of faceless minions and… escape.

So this is my gift to you. If you are stuck now at work as I was stuck then at Nanny’s, looking for a way to escape, even if only for a little while, looking for a Batman you can aspire to becoming… this is your shot.

20 Responses to 542 – The Curse • 03

      • Wow. Now how would that work for a Truth ad?

        “I want to quit smoking.”


        *shoots smoker*

        • I actually saw one of those Truth ads with something similar: it was a cigarette company board meeting and they were discussing how to get more customers. One guy says, “we lose 6000 customers a day! – well, technically they die.”

  1. You kept the blue lining pencil, didn’t ya?
    Awesomeness, pure awesomeness.

    By the way, it just hit me that if Morty was still wearing Martin’s magic disguise hat when he was turned from Troll to Furry, why didn’t he just keep looking as a normal(if anyone’s normal at all in Lesser Earth) dwarf?

  2. That video was a complete waste of some VERY good drugs…

    As I grew up, I dreamed of being Robin… yes, the Boy Wonder. Flashy outfit, cool shorts (I hate long pants) and could totally score with the chicks in the Batmobile (“Sure it’s my car! Wanna go for a ride?”) Batman does all the work, and you just tag along and beat the crap out of some cronies. What young teenage angst filled boy wouldn’t want to do that on a nightly basis? BAM! POW! Screw my homework!


  3. I know what ya mean. I had some horrible, skanky, trollish babysitters too. Thier kids were twice as bad. Bunch of lying, blackmailing, bullying little fart eaters.

    Old school Batman. What a rush for a kid. Totally rocked. The “climbing up the wall” scenes cracked me up, even then- not to mention the obviously fake fight scenes. But the complete cheezyness was all part of it’s charm.

  4. Maybe I just lost my sense of humor, but I got nothing from that video. Nothin’.

    I don’t remember ever wanting to be a super-hero growing up. I never watched the Batman show that much (I think it was a wee bit past my time anyway) but I did watch the Batman cartoon when that came out. That show rocked socks. Still does if you wanna buy the dvds. I always liked the Joker, who just happened to be voiced by Mark Hamill, who just happened to have played Luke Skywalker, and I just happen to be a huge Star Wars fan. So it all worked out.

    Looking forward to seeing what happens to Enkidu. Especially since they couldn’t find any “glitter.”

    • You said Batman cartoon, and I instantly thought of the Batman and Tarzan Power Hour from the 70s. You remember Batmite? Maybe not…

      Yeah, the New Adventures of Batman were awesome. That’s where that blocky, stylized method of superhero cartoons they’re still using today all came from. They’ve had a lot of great voice talent walk through that show. (Mark also did the voice of the Joker for the opening episode of Birds of Prey… which was as close as they could get to the Batman license.)

      • Yes. Mostly, all the DC cartoons (batman, superman, justice league) rock IMO, with great stories being told in barely 20 minutes. I always got angry when people didn’t watch them because “cartoons are for kids”, while watching dumb TV shows without a question just because they use real actors.

        • My favorite, I think, was Batman Beyond. I don’t watch Saturday morning cartoons now, mostly because I don’t get up early enough.

          The original, unedited Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker is frakking awesome.

  5. Yeah, was thinking more the 90’s cartoon. Hamill’s doing the voice for the Joker in the Arkham Asylum video game too. And the dude who did Batman reprised his role too, as well as Harley Quinn. We downloaded the demo, my wife being a bigger Batfan than I’ll ever be. It’s pretty good, check it out if you’re a gamer and have Xbox Live.