First, a funny (non-cutsie, no music, I know how some of you hate that) video to get you in the mood.
Today is a special Christmas-flavored blog all about my favorite time of year, Christmas! Yuletide! Winter Solstice! The time of year when I get presents! Yippee!
Of course, as I have observed elsewhere, it is also the time of years when my family goes crazy and Lena and I are forced to celebrate nearly a month early just to keep my mother from ruining our holiday too… but that really doesn’t matter. Things have been pretty quiet so far, and I’m keeping my fingers crossed hoping that we will get through this Most Joyous time without heartrending drama or broken crockery.
But getting to the point… I was standing in line at Publix yesterday and witnessed an old man nearly bite the head off of the cashier when she told him to have a “Happy Holiday.”
“I’m not a damn jew!” he snapped. “I’m a christian! And it’s not ‘Holiday,’ it’s Christmas!”
After the cranky old codger had tottered off, I observed to the slightly stricken cashier, “Good thing he was a religious man. I can’t imagine how much trouble you’d have been in if he weren’t a fucking christian.”
Which brings me around to this. Every year you see a push by the “Take Back Christmas” crowd to place their indelible stamp on Their Holiday. This group resents the intrusion of other people’s holidays into the same time frame as theirs, as well as attempts by others towards politeness by not assuming that everything is all about Christ. It is to these folks that I address the following: You can never, ever, Take Back Christmas. You’re too late, it’s already gone. I have it now — it’s mine, and I’m not giving it back. Worse yet, I’m an atheist, so for me the season is all about pretty lights, eggnog, presents, and half-price sales at Best Buy… with no religious connotations at all. There’s a Tinkerbell on top of my tree.
So give it up. Go home. Celebrate any day you like any way you like. Love your family. Eat fruitcake. Go to church.
But do not use everyone else’s holiday season as an excuse to publicly berate a poor girl behind a cash register who was just trying to be nice to you. That simply ain’t christian.
(P.S. Feel free to comment, but there’s no need to feel aggrieved if this doesn’t describe you. I know most christians don’t give a fig how anyone else might choose to celebrate Christmas. This isn’t about them, only a small, even sillier subset thereof.)