171-There Are Always Two

Okay, where to begin…

The graphics card was overheating in my computer, causing a lot of strange and unintended artifacts to pop up on my screen. This is especially irritating if you are a cartoonist. I took it into the local Apple Store and they fixed it. No muss, no fuss, and since I purchased the computer less than a year ago, also no cost. (Yay, my team!)

Lena went looking for Burger King’s contact information the other day online, to log a complaint about myexperience at a restaurant a couple of weeks ago. She found the website, though there was no link to their contact information. You had to type “Contact Info” into the site’s search engine and then click on the link that popped up there. Once into the contact page, there below the exhortation to “Help us help you HAVE IT YOUR WAY®.” she found the message that “E-mail communication is not accepted.” There was a physical address and a phone number. She called, and was left even more frustrated by her experience with the company representative than she was by the local Burger King refusing my coupon. She has therefore declared Burger King to be henceforth Banned from our patronage. Which is fine really. I like Hardees better anyway.

Lena has decided to write a viral email about a woman who poured that gel-fuel stuff you use for cooking in fondue pots on a cockroach and set it on fire. In her story, the cockroach runs under a drape and sets it ablaze, resulting in the loss of the home. The moral? Always have a clean and safe environment for torturing insects.

I think the new ATM machines at my bank must have been made by Diebold. Twice in a single week I have spent a half-hour in the bank filing reports on checks that their machines have eaten — no records, no receipts. However, having spent so much time inside it, I can tell you that the remodel of the bank’s interior is really nice. I hope they haven’t been screwing up the ATMs just to get people to come inside and look at the bank. I gots stuffs to do!

A friend of ours who is an EMT told us a story that happened to her a couple of days ago. She was responding to a two-car accident and received a warning from the JSO (Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office) on site to hold off because the situation looked too dangerous. In a few minutes they called again to give her the go-ahead and she and her partner showed up. It seems that “Corporate Dude” smashed into the rear of “Soccer Mom’s” minivan while chatting on his cell phone. Mom gets out of her car and Dude won’t even get off of the phone to talk to her. After a bit of screaming Mom snatches the phone away from Dude’s ear and begins beating him about the head and shoulders with it. JSO was forced to physically restrain the woman, eventually placing her in a straight jacket and Baker-acting her for 24 hour observation. No one was hurt in the accident, although the cell phone did perish in the ensuing fracas.

Check you guys out again next week!

One Response to 171-There Are Always Two

  1. Honestly, Corporate Dude is the one who should have been fitted with an “I-love-me-coat”. Imean, you crash into someone and can’t even be bothered to get off the phone to talk to the person you crashed into? 👿 😈 He deserved to be beaten, and she deserved a medal. In my not-so-humble opinion. Then again, I used to drive for a living and I’ve seen all kinds of “Corporate Dude” stupidity…