May 2009

488 – The Lizard King: 15

May 15, 2009

Some people are dog people, some prefer cats. Both types generally like to nuzzle up to their pets and draw comfort from a warm, fuzzy, loving body held close. Other folks are… snake people, and they’re a little different. A friend of Lena’s who works in a pet shop describes snake people in two varieties. “There are [...]

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487 – The Lizard King: 14

May 14, 2009

What happened: On the morning of April 27th the back-up plane to Air Force One was sent to New York, along with an honor guard of two F-16 fighter jets, for a photo op with the Statue of Liberty. The FAA had informed the police department about the photo shoot, but had given them strict instruction [...]

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486 – The Lizard King: 13

May 13, 2009

Last March, in an effort to stem the ever increasing tide of illegal drug commerce, Mexican police destroyed thirty shrines to Jesús Malverde, the so-called “Narco-Saint.” As of yet the definitive picture of Malverde hasn’t really emerged, but we do know that he was either a construction or railway worker before turning to a life of [...]

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485 – The Lizard King: 12

May 12, 2009

I feel so sorry for this kid. He clearly wasn’t ready for this, and nobody rescues him the whole, sad, embarrassing time. He’s something of an internet sensation now though, as his catch phrase, “boom goes the dynamite,” has run rampant across YouTube. For those who haven’t yet seen this, I present the sad tale [...]

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484 – The Lizard King: 11

May 11, 2009

  TSA has piloted their new “Millimeter wave” scan devices (similar to the “backscatter X-ray” but supposedly without being fatally cancer-causing) at 18 airports around the country. This is a big open-sided booth-thingie that sits in the middle of the airport (meant to replace metal detectors) that passengers walk through on their way to their [...]

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483 – The Lizard King: 10

May 8, 2009

With all the hoopla about the “redefinition of marriage,” it is somewhat surprising that it has taken six years for anyone to notice that Merriam Webster had done just that.  Apparently while the anti-gay marriage activists were waving their placards and making snide comments about Ryan Seacrest they quietly lost the war. Now that the battle [...]

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482 – The Lizard King: 09

May 7, 2009

The New York Times city room has spotted the earliest known use of an emoticon in the english language. The abuser was none other than the Uncle of our Country, President Abraham Lincoln. The sideways winkey-face was written into Lincoln’s speech where he hoped people might be laughing at his jokes.  This is no surprise [...]

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481 – The Lizard King: 08

May 6, 2009

Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Iowa (!) all have now legalized gay marriage. On the 1st of September, Vermont will join them. Iowa and Vermont are of particular importance as their legalization was achieved through legislative, rather than judicial means. This means it has been formally written into law, and cannot be as easily overturned.  The federal [...]

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480 – The Lizard King: 07

May 5, 2009

According to an article in the occasionally dubious New York Post, once well-paid women the city over are losing their jobs to the recession, and taking jobs as strippers, exotic dancers, and “massage girls.” Real estate workers are particularly hard hit, according to club owners. Many of these women are reporting greatly increased incomes compared to what [...]

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479 – The Lizard King: 06

May 4, 2009

911 Calls A woman has a life or death emergency in her car: There was a second one I wanted to put up here, but it was over 4 minutes long and I thought that was a bit much. Basically this guy is driving, gets lost, parks his ferrari on some railroad tracks, and calls [...]

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